Net Worth Jan. 2010: Not So Bad!

Net Worth Feb. 1, 2010. $189,083 (-11,515, -5.74%)

Highlights:

* Holy heck! What happened to the market? I looked up and we're down 5K in one month?!?
* We paid 10K in quarterly taxes to Uncle Sam for the end of 2009. We didn't have our business together, so this is a serious overpayment. I know, I know, loan to the IRS, blah blah blah. But you really don't want to owe when you have a small business! And we should get a lot of it back in a couple months.

So, this is not nearly as bad as it looks, since a lot of the loss is a temporary loan to the IRS. But the market needs to get its act together! We're always down in quarterly payment months, so this is no surprise.

EA Sports Active

I'm on Day 8 of the 30 Day Challenge on the Wii's EA Sports Active. I decided to try this because Krystal was doing it too, and hey I've blown money on far stupider things.

I started with Wii Fit, which I just thought was kind of dumb. I don't have the patience for the yoga, and the cardio was childish. But then... EA Sports Active was exactly what Wii Fit should have been. Dripping sweat, 80 different 30 second activities kind of thing. It's the best. I got some $10 ankle weights instead of the stupid band, and I'm actually weightlifting! Me! Go me!

My fancy 24 Hour Fitness subscription has expired. You know what, it was nice. If I lived near one that worked for the Costco deal, I'd still be a member. That Costco 24 Hour Fitness deal is the best gym deal anywhere. But, it's hard to fit in the gym and just make yourself go.

Then, for me it's hard to keep going once you get there. I'll come up with some excuse. Well, that part of the gym is too crowded. I don't want everyone staring at my butt on that treadmill in front. I'll just skip the last 3 reps (Wii won't let you do that!), I'll just stop NOW, on the treadmill (Wii won't let you do that!). Plus, I don't have to cram in some classes. The Wii is always there.

I love EA Sports Active!

The Home/Office

I've been working on this for a while, and I think we might just be able to pull it off.

We have the least rules in the US for sure for property like this, but it's still a lot of rules. And boy is it a pain!

The best part of this (possible!) transaction is that there won't be a realtor. HOORAY!

I've gotten two appraisals, the seller is getting another one, and then we'll make a deal like grown adults.

If you think about it, realtors are like telling a used car salesman to talk to another used car salesman about how much you should pay for your car. Ugh. I'll be thrilled if I can just avoid the leeches.

I'm trying not to get my heart set on it. Really trying.

Haiti

I've actually been to Haiti. In March 2008. My friend worked at one of the many non-profits now in the news. I even titled it "Going to Haiti, Even Though I Can't Afford It." That's why I have been trying not to watch the news.

It's strange that a place I had such a good time, hell, a place we considered adopting from, is suffering so much.

I felt the same about New Orleans (though obviously, they aren't the same). I remember being so glad that I had seen New Orleans in her prime, that I had felt it and seen it and experienced it and tasted it before things would never be the same. Haiti was certainly not in her prime, and I think her best days are ahead. But I have still been trying to dodge the news, it's just too close to home.

Denial and Money

I work with battered women, so I think a lot about what causes battered women to go back. To live a state of denial. Sometimes people enable this. They look the other way, they buy the dumb excuses, like falling down the stairs again. Usually, these women are just too isolated to have anyone telling them the truth. Besides, it's none of your business.

It's the same with lousy money habits. We think it's a secret no one can see, and mostly we just pretend it doesn't exist or we make up dumb excuses to ourselves or to other people. My wake-up call was when I started blogging two years ago. I was paying gobs of interest, I was up to my neck in debt. Even after paying off some backbreaking student loans, I was pretty bad with money.

And you know what, I lived in denial. I didn't even know my debt totals for a long time. I never put it all in one place to actually see the truth. For years, I just paid bills as they came in and tried not to think about what it meant to be in that much debt. It's normal to be in debt, and it's no big deal. Right?

I try to think of my own denial about my self-destructive behavior when I hear these women. I try to remember that they don't know what the truth is. They haven't let themselves see it. The first step to getting out a bad situation is to realize that you are in one.

Marriage and Housework

FB shared this little jewel. Basically, this woman works full-time, he doesn't make any money, and he expects her to do all the cooking/cleaning/laundry. Same old.

Working with battered women, this kind of shit really raises red flags for me. Someone who values you as less, someone who issues orders, someone who doesn't engage at least conversation is bad news. That said, a lot of women create this situation because they just do it all and then are surprised when that's the way it is supposed to be. Women don't assert themselves.

Today, I am doing all of the laundry and the errands because Senor Dog is very busy. Sometimes, it is the other way around.

I remember I heard once that marriage is not 50/50, it is 100/100. That you have to do all that you can all the time, and together you keep it going. Some people have a chore chart. Some people know what their zones are. My sister-in-law does the laundry and the cleaning, he does the yard work, the cooking, and the groceries. You can only do what works for you, and I don't think anyone has a perfect marriage or a marriage that is identical to anybody else's.

When I see how truly awful men, and all that women tolerate, I am so glad to have such a good man. And marriage is hard work, and I'm glad we both understand that.

Trolls and Batterers

I work at a women's non-profit. That means I work with a lot of battered women. It's not all I do, but it's enough.

(By the way, women's shelters always need toiletries. It's hard to overstate what shampoo or perfume mean to these women after she wasn't "allowed" to wear perfume or have nice things.)

They warned me that it would only be a matter of time until a woman would get killed on my watch. Anyone who has ever worked with/known/helped a battered woman knows why. You just can't help them unless they want to be helped, and sometimes it feels like they are just trying to get themselves killed.

I thought I had helped this woman. I knew the situation wasn't perfect, but I thought I had helped her and that things would get better. She was even a nurse who made all the money, and was a con who sat at home controlling her and spending her money.

Well, she went back. She loves him, and I don't know him. Now she is in the hospital, and the kids are in foster care.

Sometimes I wonder if this is my relationship with this blog. Insecure loser trolls are not worth my time. (I'm looking at you Henry and Nelson!) It's always men with nothing going on with their lives. You know what, these men are garbage. And yet, I empower them for some reason or want their approval or something. Why?

Batterers are a worthless waste of oxygen. They are truly evil men. They live to destroy, to tear women down. They try to control women with money, with time, with all their relationships. They just want to bring her down to make them feel like they are worth something. You know what, that's what these trolls are. I'm just not going to take it anymore. Maybe I'll just delete it. Maybe I'll require a Blogger account.

It's a big Internet. If you don't like me, don't read it. It's my blog, and I'll publish what I want, and that includes your trash comments. It's really not that hard. Get a life.

Taking a Break

I'm going to take a little break from blogging. The trolls have been really nasty the last couple weeks, and I need to think about whether it is worth it anymore to me. I guess there will always be people who want to tear you down and destroy what you create.

In the meantime, I am going to try to move forward on the house deal.

The Strip Club, Again

Well, J. Howard is back. Like last time, Señor Dog did some business at the strip club.

J. Howard has really come through for us, and he really has given Señor Dog a lot of work. So... We'll make him happy.

This time the bill was $1500 for three guys. I didn't even ask for the story.

I trust my Señor. When he's thinking or talking or planning about work (which he loves), he misses everything else in the room. His focus was the business, which means he was taking care of us. He's smart, and he's always a step ahead.

I don't really have a problem with strip clubs in this context because they help our bottom line, and if it helps take care of our family, I'll take it. This is one of the many reasons I think it's hard for women to compete on the same level as men in business. It's not fair, it sucks, and it's sketchy, but it's reality.

The Numbers on the Home/Office

I've talked to some people. I think this might actually work. I am trying to pinch myself and not fall in love again, but it really feels like the stars are aligning this time.

Let's just throw out a number. 530K.

The mortgage guy said he can get us 470 in mortgage. Now that Señor Dog has been incorporated 2 years, his income counts. Neat. Estimating high for taxes and insurance and so on and a tax rate of 33%, that is total cost of about $3,300/mo., without cleaning out our cash for the down payment.

The house is currently set up as office space on the bottom floor, and a house on the top two floors. We don't have any zoning, so that is OK here. We would buy it as residential because 2/3 is used as residential, so we would get Obama's money.

We would have some extra office space. This is good when you are a growing small business, but I think we could rent out some of the space for now for, say, $750-$1000/month. We've been pricing out office space, and it's hard to find the kind of thing we would be offering our tenant, so I think it would be pretty easy to get a business tenant.

This obviously has tax issues that I haven't figured out yet. We could do something like deduct the home office, and then we would have to pay taxes on that percent of the house when we sold it. There's also the complication that if your house is TOO commercial you lose your homestead exception for property tax, and we don't want that yet. There's also the issue of who is renting to the tenant, and how you deduct that and so on.

Clearly a lot of tax issues.

But the math seems OK. We would be paying 2K to rent some townhouse anyway, plus 1K to rent a (not as good location) office. Plus, we can get someone else to help with our bills. And at the end of the day, we have a nice commercial building to sell, or, better yet, sell to the company, scale up, and convert to a bigger office for our business.