I posted earlier that I had cut the officiant at the wedding. Well, I didn't really cut him, he cut himself.
Our families' religions are incompatible, and both sides have some zealots. We can't ask anyone from either religion without offending half of the group. Actually, with all the religious people, there's no way we can have this wedding at all without offending somebody.
When our officiant bailed, we had to look in ourselves to see what matters in the ceremony. We wanted someone, above all, who would be comfortable in front of a lot of people and wouldn't panic (clearly, not the previous officiant) and someone who actually knew and loved us. Hence, our friend the actor. We also needed someone neutral.
Texas is pretty lax on who can marry you. Our actor friend offered to get a sham clergy certification (he called it "Church of the Internet"). But that seems like a lie to me. If we're going to go to all this trouble to cut both religions, we're not going to bring in a third non-religion just to please Texas.
So, we're just going to get the JP when we get our certificate. Not the most romantic, but it's real and it's us.
Mr. Dog is added on my health insurance the calendar month after we get married. If we get married in January, he could have two more months of health insurance as opposed to getting married in March. We'll just tell people we did it officially before the wedding at the JP, because it's the truth.
Saturday, December 20, 2008
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6 comments:
Wow, I never imagined the struggle from this for you both. Glad to see you have it under control. Who would think that love combining would be so hard?
Funny, later you will look back and chuckle at this - I'm sure.
If you are both comfortable with this decision, and don't feel like you are just filling out the paperwork, I am 100% behind you. If you feel like you are missing something or compromising too much, I urge you to think again. The "church of the internet" is a paperwork pusher - just like what you are doing with the JP. So if you would feel something more with the actor and that ceremony, I encourage you to re-think your position.
That being said, I applaud your sensible thinking in getting your man on insurance quickly. I am a bit surprised it takes that long for him to appear on your insurance. Most places I have worked it is retroactive - you have 30 days to get the paperwork in, but you are covered from day one of "life event changes".
Just curious what the 2 religions are? TX seems full of Baptist/fundamentalist type??
we did our JP one year to the day before. Then a nice minister guy said the ceremony. Considering the hotel picked him we didn't care. In fact we bluntly told him we weren't religious, already married, and good to roll with whatever. BUT keep it short because my guests were fainting in the heat on the beach.
Marriage is marriage and a party is a party--the party part is for folks to come, revel in your happiness, and leave toasters. I see no problem with your plan, except maybe for your parents. Congratulations to you both.
So...when is the secret "Big Day" in January. Hmm...? You can tell us, we only no you as Dog :)
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