Instead of bottle service in San Francisco, I'm eating homemade mole in the Valley.
I hate going to the Valley because it has such a narrow mindset. Nobody feels like they can ever leave. They feel like they're stuck there, when they're not! Really, they're just scared of people who aren't like them. I don't belong in the Valley, and I find it hard to even relate to them anymore. It's like everyone collectively gave up. Things will never get any better. Besides the Valley is a whole lot better than Mexico! Shouldn't we be grateful for that?
This time around, I noticed how shabby all the things were. Silverware mismatched, old towels, stained sheets, ripped sofas, mismatched repaired furniture. Everywhere. Maybe I never noticed it before because that's how my parents sort of live as well.
I wonder how much of success is in your mindset. Senor Dog and I made up our minds a long time ago that we will succeed in the big city, that we will stand on our own with plenty to spare, that we will keep accomplishing more. Our silverware matches but it wasn't expensive, our towels are truly fantastic, though we only have four.
This isn't really about the silverware, but I think it does reflect when you've just given up. I'm just thinking that maybe when you give up on your own dreams, when you'll always be where you are and things can't get any better, when you'll always buy everything second-hand, when you'll never be able to open a knitting shop around here, you give up on the appearance of your home as well.
Update: Living Almost Large really gets it. Read her thoughts here.
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11 comments:
What Valley are you referring to?
The south Texas-Mexico border is called the Valley. It's not even actually a valley, but that's what it's called.
Do you think they have given up or are just comfortable and don't really care that their towels don't match? My in-laws live in central PA and they are very comfortable living in an area I consider backward. They couldn't imagine living where I do near NYC and they don't see anything wrong with how they live. Not everyone strives for the same things in life.
Showing your social class again.
Is it possible that matching, "nice" towels and silverware are not the be-all and end-all?
Is it possible that there are greater issues in life, and that everyone does not find it worthwhile to replace towels and silverware (maybe even stainless - gasp!) that do the job? That they might not care about it even if they "could"?
Maybe I should think about upgrading from sufficient towels to fantastic ones. Let me ponder it a minute....
I'm done pondering. Nope!
Do you really think that towels, sheets, and furniture are gauges of attitudes and ambition? I'm guessing that they are gauges of mindsets, all right - but they reflect the desire to conform and keep up appearances more than anything else.
I really dont think its a question of class, IMHO a lot of people prefer to have the money in their pockets rather than spend it on stuff to impress other people. I once went to the house of two well off Doctors, their house was far from opulent, in fact you might call it scruffy, I actually thought it was scruffy then (i was young and naive)but now looking back it was comfortable but very well worn and all paid for.
haha - sorry but everything in my house is mismatched because i dont care if it matches or not. I shop at second hand stores because - i don't care to spend a huge amount more for something that may be a little prettier but is no more serviceable.
i am not buying a 500.00 piece of furniture only to have children pets neices and nephews put holes and spill juice on it. nope.
if i need a bowl - i go to goodwill down the street and buy one for .71. Because I see no point in driving to another store to purchase a matching set.
if it reflects anything on me it reflects that. certainly not that i've given up on anything.
now if you want to talk about the high school drop-out rate, gang activity, teen pregnancy rate, etc as signs of giving up then i'm with you.
I'm kinda glad that everyone isn't writing about how mismatched silverware is such a faux paus! :) My silverware is inexpensive and definitely doesn't match. I have a collection from several different roommates and trips to Target to add additional spoons. I also split my collection when I moved to Texas and gave half to my sister.
I'm a big fan of nice sheets...but...what type of towels do you use? I'm looking to purchase a nice pair, and I'm not really sure where to go.
Right, and I didn't mean "high class" when I said social class. It seems obvious that people inclined to critique those with less or not-as-nice "stuff" are just hanging on to lower rungs of the social class ladder. Fancy things are most often the trappings of desperate social climbers.
Wow, Dog--it may be awhile before I invite you to MY house. (Not that you couldn't get a column or two out of such a visit!)
Some folks (including moi) just really don't care if their silverware doesn't match! Or if their towels are threadbare!
I don't think that would change even if I had a lot of money. It's more a matter of lifestyle.
If my friends judged me on such things, I'd probably get new friends.
There are times I am sad about my mismatched thrift store silverware, and other times I'm just thrilled to have another clean spoon in the drawer so I don't have to wash any before I eat.
It's a matter of perspective and when your life turns around, the mismatched stuff won't mean a lick of difference to you.
Try to view the glass as half full as much as you can.
Hey don't go knocking my silverware! We do have enough of one set to match, but we mix and match between several sets. One is the set I grew up eating off of, totally cheesy 70's. But I love them, our favorite plates are even more hideous. I simply don't care about those things, and if I got a complete new matching set - we'd also keep using the old ones. Image is just that, an illusion.
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