I am not borrowing mom's money.
I've had mom's 15K for a while, just sitting in liquid cash. She loaned me the 15K when we needed to make the deal work like 12 houses ago. I never gave it back when the deal fell through because she told me to keep it until we closed a house deal, and we thought some bank buffer might help (HA! that was wrong!).
Well, I gave it back. I never counted it in the net worth, so that was easy.
I decided that if we can't stand on our own feet when we buy a house, we're not going to do it. I'm just not going to borrow money from mom.
I know mom wants to help and so on, but it just isn't right for me. It makes us have a business relationship, and I don't want that. When I am talking to/thinking about/meeting with mom, I don't want it to have anything to do with money. When we fly somewhere, I don't want mom to think I'm doing it on her money. I'm just not going to go there. It's not worth it to me.
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9 comments:
IMO if you say you aren't using your mother's money for your own use she should trust you on that. I know such is very difficult between parents and children (been there myself) but she should trust you on that.
Has she made any inquries or issues about the monet lately?
I think you made a very good decision. I'm sure mom would be just as proud when you buy a modest home on your own.
I second you giving the money back to your mom. It's best that everything between families is transparent and up front. And timely. If you're not using it, no need for it not to be in her bank account.
Master - read much lately?
"Well, I gave it back."
This is an excellent decision! I think that this is the right move to make for you guys. The stress involved with borrowing from family members can sometimes ruin relationships.
Good for you! This is the best thing you could have done!
Henry - That's why I said if there is trust between a parent and child. If not, well...
BTW, depending on the age of the parent and any other siblings in the family, gifting is a good estate planning tool.
I really prefer not to owe family members, either. And there are strings. With your net worth, you don't really need your mom's money, so it's just as well that you gave it back. And you still have great credit with her, and you know that she'll be there for you with a loan if you need it. Sounds like the best plan all around.
Totally agree with you on taking your mom's money. It's a weird line to walk and she is your mother but it creates awkward situations and unexpected difficulties if you did take the money in the future.
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